Though most people would agree that honesty is an important value, surprisingly few people live an honest life; little-white-lies are all too common. Some people lie outright, while others lie by a mission. While there are those who believe that ignorance is bliss, others may not take the offense slightly, even if it means sparing someone’s feelings, a lie is a lie. Lying may be more common than you think; one study found that 40% of adults lie at least once a day, usually in small ways. Even though some people lie more or less than others lying is inevitable. So how do you navigate a world full of liars, when you value honesty and integrity, here are seven traits of genuinely honest people so you can decide whether you or someone in your life is truly an honest person.
Calm & consistent voice
One of the easiest telltale signs of lying is a loud voice. When you catch someone in a lie they’ll often raise their voice in defense, as a way to establish power. Honest people rarely become defensive when they’re asked questions even if those questions seem accusatory in nature. When an honest person replies, their tone of voice is calm and consistent since there is no possible way they’ll be found out, they have nothing to worry about, there is no reason to lie or make up a story, there’s nothing to hide.
Lairs can come across as rude sometimes. Honest people are less concerned with catering to your feelings; they would rather tell you a truth that hurts than let you believe a lie that makes you feel good about yourself. They aren’t afraid to tell the truth even if it means they’ll come across as rude or harsh because of this fact you might think an honest person is mean sometimes. If you’re not ready for the raw unadulterated truth, then don’t ask an honest person, they’re not going to sugarcoat a situation or pretend that everything is okay when it isn’t. They’ll present the facts and give their personal opinions even if it’s not what you want to hear. If you’ve ever received tough information from an honest person, know that their intent is not malice it’s honesty.
The closer you are to someone, the more likely you are, to be honest with them. Think about it, you owe honesty to your best friends more than you do to the store clerk in a town you’re passing through. Close and lasting friendships are built on trust which requires honesty if you have a friend who’s there when you need them. The most you can believe in their integrity and if they can’t be there you know they’ll give an honest and valid reason. Why honest people make great friends, they are not only dependable but upfront as well and they’d rather confront you face-to-face about an issue than gossip behind your back.
They maintain strong beliefs
If you are looking for more honest people in the world, you’re probably one of them, that’s because honest people value honesty and they usually have other strong beliefs as well with high standards and a rock-solid moral compass. Honest people are firm about their beliefs and they won’t mind sharing them with you or anyone. Sometimes these strong core beliefs and a willingness to be open about them create barriers for them in the professional world. They may view a job that doesn’t align with their belief system as distasteful and inadequate, besides employers often hesitate to hire someone whose beliefs align more with honesty and transparency rather than financial growth and prosperity. On the other hand, employers with integrity will appreciate someone who’s not afraid to speak their mind even if it means going against the grain. Strong beliefs are also useful in cultivating a personal life full of authentic and caring people. These beliefs make it easier for honest people to weed out those who are wrong for their life.
They’ve got thick skin
You know what they say; if you can’t take the heat, get out of the kitchen. Honest people dish out the truth no matter how much it hurts and they need to be ready to bear that burden themselves, so it’s normal for honest people to have thick skin because they’re accustomed to being disliked. When an honest person reveals the truth, it can cause an insecure person’s facade of happiness to crumble around them. As their insecurities come to light, people may become defensive, volatile, and even verbally abusive. Warriors of the truth are like fighters, in order to preserve their own peace of mind, they must grow accustomed to those who can’t handle the truth, and often it’s something that is weathered with time and experience.
They’re not interested in being popular
Honest people are entirely disinterested in winning the admiration of the masses, they don’t desire to be seen as the most attractive, most celebrated, or most interesting person around, because, let’s be honest, it probably isn’t true. When honest people do good, they do it because they want to not because they need leverage. They’re more interested in self-growth than winning a popularity contest. Those who are honest with the world know they are worthy, they know who they are, and they aren’t ashamed of it, even when other people would be.
They own up to their mistakes
Honest people have all these amazing traits, but, obviously, no one is perfect, everyone makes mistakes, but what sets honest people apart is their willingness to take responsibility and apologize when they mess up. You’ve probably encountered someone who is bad at saying sorry. Instead of owning up to their mistakes, they’ll make excuses or apologize that you experience negative feelings not that they did something wrong. Honest people are different, those with integrity seek the truth even if the truth exposes them for doing something wrong, and they will swallow their pride and their ego for the sake of an authentic and sincere apology. Telling the truth doesn’t come naturally, defense mechanisms like blame projection and deceit are much easier alternatives at the moment, but avoiding responsibility only creates more trouble.
Hopefully, this list will help you identify if you or someone in your life is truly honest. It might also make you realize that perhaps you’re not as honest as you thought. Nevertheless, we should all pursue the truth even when it seems daunting and difficult. The world needs more honesty. If you lie about who you are, about someone else, what actually happened, or how you feel, you’ll only dig yourself deeper into a problem of your own creation. The choice is yours, be honest, or lie. What you choose will impact your life immensely.
What do you think, do you embody these qualities? Also, how has honesty or dishonesty impacted your life? Share your stories and experiences in the comments below.
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- image: Vecteezy – editing: Canva